Which qualities would you expect a friend to have? Would you consider yourself to be a good friend? What constitutes a good friend? My name is Stephen Hill from Birmingham in the UK. I am now thirty-four years of age and it seems that the older I become the less true friends I actually have. Why is this? Is it because I am becoming less popular or is it because I am expecting more as I mature? In this article I will be attempting to answer some of these questions.

I expect a good friend to be somebody who I can depend on one hundred percent; if I tell them a secret or some personal information I would not then expect them to spread this, in the form of gossip, to other people. If I were in trouble I would expect to be able to seek help from a friend, mainly for advice and guidance but also for other types of help, for example a roof over my head.

A good friend is someone who is kind to me and does not try to hurt me in any way. They do not let me down by promising something and then failing to deliver. As an example to this is a friend who agrees to meet you somewhere and does not then turn up. They do not try and steal your girlfriend/boyfriend from you, quite the opposite in fact, they will be totally trustworthy in every respect.

As I have become older I have become quite harsh I suppose. I think that I am a good friend to other people and I set myself quite high standards in this regard. When I do not receive the same in return, I then start to become disillusioned with my so called friends. When I was younger I think that I let certain friends get away with things, it was like I was just grateful to have them as a friend. At this stage of my life I though it was important to have a lot of friends, nowadays I believe that quality rather than quantity is the way to go.

I hope that the people who read this article will realise what is required to become a good friend and that they can learn from it.

Steve Hill is a webmaster from Birmingham, he has interests in a number of websites including:
Stammering treatment
Cure for stuttering
Stuttering information

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In life one meets and makes many friends. Some remain acquaintances with whom we share pleasantries. Childhood friends mature and remain for life or are not traceable. Fair weather friends are the ones with whom we can party or watch a movie, exactly for the sake of company.

True friendship proves for itself with life’s situations. One can make friends at any age. Marriage too is about friendship and so is rearing kids. Ever felt that sudden desire to call your best friend to tell him/her about the new child in the family? Did you felt better after crying over the phone and talking to your friend about some silly problem? Elated feelings and sadness needs to be shared.

A friend corrects you when you wear the wrong make up, compliments you at that writing skill you have, encourages you when you try out a recipe (ignoring the excess salt) , cares for you by walking the extra mile, takes you to a movie sensing you are amiss and is strict with you when you go overboard. These are the tests of friendship. As you sit in solitude, look at your fingers and count your friends, you will be amazed to find only a few.

Friendship does not restrict itself to rules of gender, age, class or distance. The inclination to communicate is essential. Holding grudges and taking pot shots only spoils a friendship. One also needs to be magnanimous by accepting the short comings of a friend. This is a major adjustment and accepts a friend as he is. Suggest but do not expect him to comply with your standards.

There is only failure when one tries to be a please-all. Compromise but also effectively clarify. When one projects an unfazed exterior and in mind goes through a gamut of negative feelings, that friendship will be short-lived.

Not by money, looks or time, but by truth is what friendship grows. In present times where one is exulted by career progress naturally there occurs a paucity of time. Excuses stem from this and many a friendship silently die. The ultimate aim of life is to be ‘happy’ and materialistic products offer very short shelf-life.

Make time for a pet, your child, your spouse, and never forget to make a friend feel special. You may have missed the birthday but be there for a friend when the path is not even. Giving a shoulder to cry on is a temporary support, Be solid like a rock to tide away the storms that test your friendship.

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Do you go to work and have your “public face” but then come home to an empty place? Do you find the only friends you have are on the computer? Do you feel lonely and wish you could change that?

Sometimes we don’t see our own part in creating the very situation we don’t want, but fortunately, when we finally do see it, we have the power to change our situation.

When we’re lonely, the people who are around us seem like strangers and we may not feel drawn to any of them. Ironically, we don’t go out and do things where we might meet people, because there is no one to go with. There may be people already near who have been trying to get to know us and feel we aren’t letting them. We may think they’re too geeky, too unattractive, too dull, and too different from us to be of interest to us, so we haven’t been them a chance. But by altering a few of our habits and assumptions, we can start building wonderful relationships and in time, not feel alone.

Start by allowing others to get to know you, even if at first you don’t have much interest in them. People can be quite surprising and some of the most amazing people don’t look like much on first impression. Remember that most relationships need time to develop, especially the best ones. Even if you take a chance on someone and decide you don’t like them after all, they may introduce you to someone you do like.

It’s also a good idea to dust off your address book and make an effort to keep in touch with people you used to know, particularly if they live or work nearby. Perhaps like you, they just got busy or drifted away, but would welcome hearing from you. Because you already know these people, you are that much closer to developing good friendships.

It’s also good to get away from your computer and go out and get involved in activities where you’ll meet people in person. You could join a sport, volunteer, join a club, or take a small class. Try different situations until you find a social group that you like. The effort is well worth it.

Learn to invite people over to your place, too. You don’t have to make it a big deal. Invite them over to watch movies or television. Find someone or a few people with whom you can cook a meal together once a week or once a month. Ask someone to help you with a home improvement project, or offer your help to him or her. Start waving to and saying hello to your neighbors and talking to them.

You can have richer connections with people if you’re willing to give up some of your present habits. Not every person you meet will become a close friend, and it will take time to build friendships of value, but if you give it a try, you’ll find your life will be quite different in the future.

Social network users, for adding layouts to your page click Myspace Layouts. You can also use Myspace Comments to comment your friends on any social network. For myspace backgrounds click Myspace Backgrounds

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The proverb, “There are always two sides to every coin.” refers to the fact that there is more than one way to look at everything? From this concept you can create one of the main presuppositions of life; behaviors are not good or bad, rather they’re useful or un-useful in the moment. People sometimes seem to forget that last part.

The fact is that every behavior is useful in the right situation. With the right point of view you can see how something that is limiting in one way can be rewarding in another. A common example of this is the goal of putting no expectations on people in a relationship. It’s very true that it would be nice if we could live free of expectations - however, it doesn’t work that way.

Some sense of predictability creates feelings of understanding, safety and control over one’s life. This includes relationships. We have certain criteria to determine friendship and, whether we want to admit it or not, expectations and criteria go hand-in-hand. The criteria we have to identify a friend are what we expect from them. Some common criteria include things like trust, honesty, compassion, etc.

If we add the awareness that criteria can be ordered in a priority sequence then some things we can allow ourselves to be flexible on and others we can not. If a person dislikes a certain type of music upon meeting them, then setting that as an expectation in the relationship will “pigeonhole” them. That expectation is an un-useful limitation on the friendship because it does not take into account that people’s preferences can grow and change with time. Concepts more important than taste in music, such as trust, we can be less flexible about because if a friend does something to lose our trust in them (such as lie, steal, abandon, hurt, etc.), then the dynamics of the friendship can change drastically.

Even though a person can recognize a behavior may be useful in a different situation - in the immediate circumstances it may be un-useful, resulting in damage to the relationship. Admittedly it’s not so black and white; some behaviors may hurt you, however you’ll accept that it was not done with malice, rather it was unintentional. When a person repeats that behavior in spite of the fact it harms the relationship then there will reach a point where “I’m sorry” becomes insulting.

With all this in mind the questions we want to consider are; Can you allow your expectations of someone to be flexible on the minor issues while still asserting your values on the real important points?; Can we accept that people change while still being careful that those changes don’t go against our own highly valued criteria for friendship?; Is it possible to accept someone for who they are today and expect that things may change tomorrow, while at the same time, know that it’s okay to expect certain core components (such as trust, honesty, etc.) will remain somewhat consistent?

Daniel Scott, Msc.D, NLP.T, RCHt.
Soaring Success Personal Excellence
Verbal Self Defense Tactics

Mr. Scott is a professional NLP trainer and coach from Victoria, BC. His background includes a degree in Metaphysical Science and certifications in Reality Therapy, Choice Theory as well as training in meditation and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. Daniel is a Neuro Linguistic Programming Trainer fully certified by the University of NLP at the University of California Santa Cruz. His company, Soaring Success Personal Excellence Coaching, has been offering individual and organizational development coaching and training for over 7 years.

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I watched a few Chinese drama, especially those TVB ones, or Chinese movies. There are always stories about a girl and a guy, who are very close but not lovers. It’s always either the girl or the guy have their own partner, but then the girl and the guy are close. Sometime they end up falling in love, sometime they’re just friends.

Now this kinda story happens to me. I have a friend, a guy who is quite close to me. Yes, just “quite”, not “so” or “very”. We are just friends. I have a steady boyfriend(this time I mean partner) But then again, my friends always tease me about him. We never met for dinner or movie. He’s never visited my home, neither I’ve ever been to his place.

Is it just because of we always talk to each other regarding a lot of common interest? Or is it because of I helped him choosing his career path? Or maybe because he always asked me about suggestions on professional courses when there were many others to ask to? We participate in all common meets and my friends end up saying “You won’t go anywhere without him”.

I’ve talked to few close friends of mine who are already married and learned that it is dangerous to have a close boy friend after marriage as my partner will surely have objections. It’s not that he does not know about my friend, but he has never said anything specifically. But may be he’ll start minding once he ties up the knot finally.

It’s also a very common phrase that “after a certain age, boys and girls cannot be just friends, there has to be some kind of special chemistry between them”. Isn’t that pretty strange as we try to define age limit for an eternal term like friendship?

Manisha Paul is a regular blogger at Batchmates.com Manisha has her own blog at Batchmates Blog and is an active member of that site.

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The need to love and be loved are some of the strongest emotions we have on this planet and love is one feeling every person out there is hungry for. You see the kind of people we get in our life are a perfect reflection of what we are like as a person. You see what you are on the inside is what you get on the outside and this is how you attract people towards you too. But what if you were introduced to some mind blowing tricks using which you can make absolutely anyone fall in love with you? Read on to discover what these ways are and how you can make anyone fall in love with you as well…

Learn that the other person is more important than you- When you respect and value someone else on the very first impression that person instantly gets attracted to you. You see the most important person to you is you and similarly the most important person to other people is them. Therefore when you make them feel worthy and important they would instantly start getting attracted to you as you are giving them something they desire for.

Make their day special- Do you know that a small compliment can do wonders? You see a slight little compliment can many people feel special and good about themselves and this would make them get highly attracted towards you as you make their day special.

Share instead of trying to impress- Do you know that people don’t like getting impressed rather they would like to be involved. You see if you were to tell someone that you have a million dollars they would think that you are showing off but if you were to say I can share my money making secrets with you they would be more than interested.

An absolute must know for you- This secret is an absolute must know for you no matter what. This is the grand daddy of all which would give you the ultimate power to become a magnet towards which every woman would be attracted. This is only known to a few and you are one of the lucky one’s who are being introduced to this shocking secret click here- Tell me the Secret

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When you’re involved with a man there’s one question that often pops into your mind and that’s what is he really feeling for you. Not all men are the great communicators we wish they were and it can be difficult to know if his feelings reflect our feelings. When you are wondering about what’s going on in his heart and mind consider the 10 signs that he’s in love with you. Recognizing these can help you determine what he’s really feeling, even if he’s not expressing it clearly.

The most obvious of the 10 signs that he’s in love with you is his desire to spend time with you. When a man is head over heels he’ll find reasons to see the woman he adores. Even if it’s for a mere five minutes at the end of the day, he’ll make the time. On a similar note if he often texts, calls or emails you, he’s got you on his mind. This is another sign that his feelings are pretty intense.

Men are known to be very visual which is why they can’t seem to resist looking when a pretty girl walks by. One of the 10 signs he’s in love with you will be that his interest in others won’t be as piqued. If you two are out together he’ll generally focus mostly on you if he’s in love with you. He’ll also be willing to agree to an exclusive arrangement if he’s falling for you. Don’t be at all surprised if he’s the one to suggest it. If he wants you all to himself, that’s a great sign.

If he constantly wants to hold your hand, kiss you and touch you take that as a sign that he’s falling deeper for you. Although many men aren’t comfortable displaying their affection in public, you may notice him reaching for your hand more often. He’ll also want to pamper you. He may ask if you’ve eaten dinner yet or if you need anything when he calls. This shows he has genuine concern for your well being which always makes a woman feel incredibly special.

Inviting you to meet the people closest to him is one of the 10 signs he’s in love with you. If he wants you to meet his best friend, or his family take that as a step in the right direction. Men typically don’t just bring any girl home with them to meet mom and dad. You should feel honored and touched.

Some men are glued to their television sets at the same time each week to watch their favorite sports team in action. If he wants to do something with you instead of hanging out on the couch, this is great news. He’ll also be interested in your opinion if he’s in love. He’ll want you to choose activities for the two of you. This shows that he wants you to be happy, another sign that he’s developing strong feelings for you.

The last of the signs that a man is in love with you involves him talking about the future. If he suddenly starts talking about where he sees himself in a few years and if he suggests how great it would be to have children with you, he’s fallen in love with you. Listen carefully to everything he says, often his words will reveal exactly what he’s feeling, even if he doesn’t say those three little words directly.

Specific things you say and do can make a man feel helplessly drawn to you. If you are convinced he is the one there are things you can do to ensure he only has eyes for you. For more informative tips about understanding men including a way to get him to fall deeply in love with you, visit this Helpful Site!

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Sex consummates a marriage and being in a marriage without sex is not easy. The role of sex in a marriage must be well understood in order to get the real picture on how significant it is. When two people tie the knot of holy matrimony, they vow to share and stay as one entity. Sex is an expression of the intimacy that a married couple share. It is one way of expressing love to each other. You would ask yourself important questions like; What if the couple wants children and their marriage is sexless? But what would make a marriage to lack sex? There must be underlying reasons or problems that must have resulted to this marriage without sex. It is like staying without food. Either you are not hungry, you are sick, you are fasting or there is no food in the house in which case you can eat out.

Unless this hoarding of sex is due to a terminal illness affecting one of the couples, other reasons are subject to debate. When sex lacks in a marriage couples out source it from outside though in a discreet manner. This is where problems start setting in. It must be put in due consideration that sex is one of the most basic needs of a human being. This need must be fulfilled whether in a marriage context or not. A couple can pretend they are comfortable to stay together without sex but there is someone behind the scenes who meets their sexual needs. In a marriage without sex couples stay as roommates because this marriage is not a full package, it is a half package. Your partner in marriage is your friend, your husband or wife and your lover. These are the three pillars that support a marriage. Remove one pillar and the marriage tumbles down.

When stuck in a marriage without sex it means your rights are being denied. Conjugal rights in a marriage must be met and respected. Every married person has a right to sex with the other partner. A denial of this right can even end up in a court of law. If a persons rights are denied somewhere the person gets them elsewhere. A marriage without sex is therefore bound to end up in divorce as a result of conjugal rights. What would a married person be waiting for before having sex? An unmarried person would be excused for waiting till marriage. There is no reason whosoever to have a marriage without sex. A relationship is not all about sex but sex is the catalyst as well as the engine oil that makes everything work.

People staying in a marriage without sex are people living in utopia. They are lame ducks maybe waiting for the day they will meet their maker. Staying in a marriage without sex is impossible and unworkable. Let no one lie to anyone that they are contented with such an arrangement. Even if they are together it is public relations stunt but otherwise they are cheating like no one gives a damn. Their sex lives are very active and vibrant only that these services are outsourced.

Francis K. Githinji Is An Online Dating Expert. His Latest Project Marriage Without Sex Shows How The Power Of Online Dating Can Be Harnessed Internationally and With Great Success, Or You Could Post Your Valued Comments On His Blog At Marriage Without Sex

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As spring nears, couples often look for new and exciting ways to liven their marriage. Successful marriages are based upon the happiness, fulfillment and enjoyment that a couple feels in their marital relationship.

Anniversaries, birthdays, celebrations of a new job or just a fun evening with just the two of you can be the excuse that you need.

Mothers once said that a way to a man’s romantic heart was through his stomach. Spice up the evening by decorating with flowers and favorite scented candles. Use a red table cloth and napkins with hearts, to set the mood. Don’t forget to play the background music that will be pleasing to both of you. You might sit by the fire and dip strawberries in a chocolate fondue and feed each other. Let your imagination soar.

People have long recognized Valentine’s Day as the day for love and romance. One legend says that a man by the name of Valentine, who was imprisoned and in love, sent the first romantic greeting card. It became known as a Valentine card and February 14 became known as Valentine’s Day in honor of his romantic appeal. Why not try something different. A tasty menu highlights a romantic evening. First make a savory Swiss steak recipe that provides protein and dairy can be prepared ahead of time, placed in a casserole dish and baked while getting the other food on the table. Make a glazed-eyed carrot with sweet pea vegetable dish. Toss up some absolutely heavenly hash fruit salad and you are on your way to “hog heaven” with your lover. Honey butter is made by mixing honey and butter to spread on Angel biscuits.

Serve a Decadent Chocolate cake substituting applesauce for sugar and serving with fresh strawberries. Stick toothpicks in strawberries. Dip the berry in melted chocolate and shake off excess. To create a more romantic atmosphere after dinner, save orange peels from the Heavenly Hash Fruit Salad and throw into the fire in the fireplace for a captivating aroma. Hot chocolate milk topped with whipped cream may be served as an after dinner delight.

Remember that any night can be a lover or valentine night with a little extra effort.

Overcome the urge to discuss business or disagreements. Recall times that you have enjoyed together. Talk about your wedding vows and nuptial promises. Light a candle to represent the years ahead. Make the evening another memory for the future.

Take the plunge and challenge yourself: Avoid the road to divorce and enjoy a romantic meal night and just see what happens!

Pat Strawbridge is a graduate of the University of Mississippi and the Mississippi University for Women and has done postgraduate work at University of Tennessee, Knoxville in Home Economics with emphasis in family relations. She and her husband, Drennon, live in Cleveland, TN near their son, Mike and his wife, Janice, and two grandsons Scott and Will. White Bible Ceremonies for Couples: Advice for Successful Marriage is available in manual form with instructions or CD with photos, instructions and suggestions http://www.whitebibleceremony.com/ Patricia C. Strawbridge is a former home economics teacher. She also writes: Meal with a Message: http://www.mealswithamessage.com/ She compiled and edited Callaway Cookin’ cookbook.

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Wedding expenses can add up really fast! Especially if you don’t already have a budget you are working with and trying to meet. Lets first start with the average cost for your special day. Which is anywhere from $15,000 to $30,000 USD. Hopefully this is already within the range that you are budgeting.

There are certain aspects of your wedding that will take up a good percentage of this budget. The reception is usually your biggest expense. The size and number of guest you have at your reception will really determine how much you spend on this part. The average cost for roughly 150 guests comes in at $7500.

The next big expense will be the formal wear for the bride; emotion plays a big part when a bride goes out to shop for her gown or dress. So budgeting usually goes out the window especially when a bride has found “the one”. It is a good idea to determine how much you want to spend before you go shopping for your dress. The average cost of a wedding dress is around $1500. Remember renting is always an option!

Next comes photography and Video recording your important day. Having cherished memories is not optional, at least for most newlyweds. You want to make sure you capture your special day and this will cost you, anywhere from $800 on the low end but can be as high as $4000.

The last big expense I will mention here would be your entertainment, which is usually provided by a disc jockey. Entertaining your guest is one of the most important things to remember and is usually overlooked by a lot of couples walking down the aisle. Keep in mind this will be the life of your party and you surely want to get this part right so do your do diligence when choosing who will be entertaining on your special day.

To learn how to save as much as 40% to 70% on your wedding expenses, click here to get started today.

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